What MS has Taught Me (Final)

 

I have been thinking for a while on what I wanted to end this little series with.  There are so many thoughts and feelings that are constantly running through my head because of Multiple Sclerosis.  Do I end it on a positive note and let my readers be happy or do I be brutally honest about how I feel about this disease at the time I am writing this?  Then I decided that I am just going to write what goes through my head and see how it looks when I am done.  So here it goes….

What has MS taught me?

It has taught me the importance of diet and taking care of my health.  It has forced me to become more educated in food and supplements then I ever would have been without having been diagnosed.  It has taught me how screwed up America’s approach to healthy foods and disease prevention (or lack there of) is.  It has taught me the importance of exercising and how good you feel after a hard workout.  It has made me appreciate running and all of the beautiful scenery and nature that I see while on my runs.  It has made me appreciate the open road on my road bike and the ability to be alone with my thoughts in a positive enviroment.  I think most importantly though it is teaching me to appreciate life.  It has taught me to slow down, look at all of the things that mother earth has to offer.  The sunrises, the sunsets, the fall colors, and most of all the ability that mother earth has to work so seamlessly if we let her.

MS is drawing me back to the simpler times of living.  Living off of the land and being less dependant on our world of convenience.  I focus less on material goods and services and more on what I have immediately in front of me.  My house, my land, my family, our diets, our health, and the things that truly make me happy.  I have found that I am much happier staying around the house then going out to eat or to the bar.  I enjoy doing chores and learning to fix things myself instead of calling a repair man or paying someone to do the job because you just didn’t feel like doing it.

I’m learning how to deal with fear.  This disease is terrifying to me.  It mentally eats away at me about 95% of the day.  Every time my legs get a tingle in them or go numb, or I trip over something or bump into something when I am walking I can’t help but to think “I am one day closer to losing my mobility?”.  But that is also pushing me to do what I can and what I want to accomplish right now.  Not waiting until tomorrow.  It has taught me self discipline.  If I don’t do my daily exercises or follow a strict diet my symptoms act up causing the mind games to start which then causes stress which then makes the symptoms worse.

I have learned that it is better to just keep doing the best you can do and not complain.  I know that anyone without MS will never know the physical and mental pains that go along with this disease, and they will never understand the fear that it instills in you on a daily basis. It has taught me that there are far more serious diseases out there and that although I am unfortunate to have gotten this one I am fortunate that I got this one.

It hasn’t been an easy road and I know that I have a long way to go.  I have some great support around me with my friends, family and most of all my wife Vanessa.  I know that when the MS acts up it really changes my moods as much as I try to not let it, and I thank my family for putting up with me.

This disease does suck.  There is no doubt about that.  But it has taught me a lot of good and opened my mind and eyes to a lot of different things around me.  I hope that the knowledge I have learned, am learning, and am  trying to pass around is helping some other people as well.

That so far is what MS has taught me.

Thanks for reading.